Part II Boards...

I'm pretty sure that I just saw this very question on Jeopardy last week... "Chiropractic students must take this many sets of National Boards in order to become a nationally certified chiropractor and as payment, they would also like this many limbs as well."





Alex, what are 4?





Correct, for $200.





Honig took his 2nd part of Boards on Sept 12th, out of 4 parts total that he'll take. Part 3 will be taken in March 2009 and Part 4 will be taken in May 2009, and we have each decided to sell a kidney on the black market to pay for these ostentatiously expensive tests. I checked into it, and I can still breastfeed with 1 kidney so I'm good to go.








Of course Honig woke up 8 seconds before he had to leave to go sign in to start liquifying his hippocampus for hours on end; we figured he should have the breakfast of champions before he headed out. A strawberry and cream cheese Toaster Strudel. Manna from heaven.

Ash, this one is for you. He was making the nervous "Llllllllllllll" sound that you so graciously taught us. See?! He's even making the face!

"Bye Honig! Make sure to pick up some milk and cereal on your way home! Love you! Oh yeah, good luck! But seriously, don't forget to go to the store!"

Fast forward 6 weeks to October 24th.

Our lovely computer decided it wanted to crash so we were forced to go the public library and use the public computers to check his scores. They make you wait 6 excruciating weeks to find out how you did, and Honig never sleeps well the night before for fear that he is going to fail.

So we mosey on over to the library, and when I say "mosey", I really mean I barely manage to jump into an already accelerating car because Honig has such tunnel vision to get there that he thinks that the McDonald's take out bag sitting on the drivers seat is me, but he realizes it actually isn't his pregnant wife when he reaches over to hold my hand and all he feels is a crumpled up double cheesburger wrapper. "Chelle, you really need to start using some lotion on your hands because they're all dry and crac...Oh My!! Sorry honey! I thought you were already in the car!" At which point I have just managed to hurdle myself into the passenger seat and then punch him in the thigh and whip out my voodoo doll of him and stick a needle through some very essential anatomical parts I figure he will NEVER need again and then put a curse on him through struggling for gasps of air.

2 minutes later, we're at the library and all is well. I get out the hydrochloric acid I keep in my purse and douse the keyboard with it and then get out my handy dandy blowtorch and all but incinerate the keyboard because I saw the person who was just using it before us, and it seems that they think one hand belongs on the keyboard and the other one belongs in their nose and they like to switch off which is which. After the smoke clears and the fire alarms have been turned off, Honig sits down to check his scores. Checking his scores always goes a little something like this...

-He gets really nervous.

-He doesn't talk for a minute.

-I'm not allowed to make any jokes or wisecracks because I'm not funny at that moment to him. Nothing in the entire universe is.

-He logs into the site where his scores are posted.

-He clicks on Part II Results and immediately looks at his scores to see if they are passing.

-OF COURSE THEY ARE! All of them. He's crazy smart.

-He tries not to crack a smile then he can't help it and it grows into a big old grin.

-He poses for a picture for me.

-He goes back to looking at his scores and how he did in each section.

-He gets really serious again and starts to talk to himself outloud asking why he did better on some parts than others.

-He stares at the screen for at least 5 minutes soaking it in.

-I, of course, take another picture of him.

-I give him a smooch and tell him "Good joerb" (and yes, I say "joerb") in my high sqeaky voice he loves.

-He is happy and that is all that matters.

"I passed! Phew."

"Wow. Seriously, I can't believe I passed, and I didn't do half bad."

He didn't do badly at all.

Now back to seriously studying those scores again.

Welcome to the enigma that is known as my husband.

GOOD JOERB HONIG! I knew you would pass with flying colors! I'm so proud of you. 2 down, 2 to go.